Text of Cartoon
Sean: Listen to this! “A local chef foraging for mushrooms has gone missing in our forest.”
Sean: The Bigfoot Monster has struck again!
Cooper: But General Sean, there is no evidence of foul play!
Sean: Cooper, how many more fungus hunters have to disappear before you accept we’re at war??
Text of Cartoon
Cooper: Dad’s been playing a lot of polka music on his accordion lately.
Cooper: It started after Mom threw out his beloved taxidermy weasel.
Cooper: I’m not sure if he’s grieving or trying to annoy her.
Cooper: Anyway, that’s why I’ve had “Who Stole the Kishka?” stuck in my head for three days!
Text of Cartoon
Radio: Sometimes when I have a difficult decision to make…
Radio: I visit the Vernon Hills Zoo late at night using my special mayoral key.
Radio: Nothing clears my mind like feeding chicken nuggets to the alligators by moonlight.
Radio: On a related note, Doug from water and sanitation, YOU’RE FIRED!
Text of Cartoon
Howl: AWOOOOOOOH!
Alvin: Maybe Bigfoot is actually a hermit living in the forest.
Cooper: Yes, and the howls we hear are his cries of regret…
Cooper: For gambling away his life’s savings at the Riverboat Casino!
Text of Cartoon
Radio: (music)
Radio: Strangers inn the nighhh~t~
Radio: Shooby dooby do~
Radio: Dooby dooby do~
